<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Burn Like Me by sobachka</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23294788">Burn Like Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sobachka/pseuds/sobachka'>sobachka</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Darkest Minds Series - Alexandra Bracken</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cole and everything you wanted to read about him, Grief/Mourning, Lets go through the league, its hard but lets go, powers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:40:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>846</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23294788</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sobachka/pseuds/sobachka</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cole Stewart growing up, and getting through the league. Also kid Liam. Also Cate. Probably Vida when the time is right.<br/>~<br/>I held it tight with the other hand, but I felt the lava boiling beneath the surface, it needed to get out. I banished the memory from my thoughts, focusing on the here. The now. </p>
<p>I imagined the lava cooling, imagined steam rising the way it would when mom poured cool water over the pot when it had boiled too much. Imagined that satisfying sound as hot fought the cold and lost. I felt my hands go steady, felt the lava cool to. </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Burn Like Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>I closed my eyes, trying to calm my nerves, even out my breathing, steady my heartbeat. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That's how it worked the first time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When I had counted to 120 with no sudden jerks or any convulsing from my hand, I allowed myself a smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Now I opened my eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I was sitting cross-legged on my bed. My black sweatpants camouflaged by the bedsheets of the same color beneath me. I had my blankets and pillows all on the far side of the bed, and I'd opened one window- just in case. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I didn't want to be in the same situation as last time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The memory of jerking awake to the smell, of the sudden flames catching on my gray blanket- jumping off my bed, trying to run from the source, when </span>
  <em>
    <span>I was the source-</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>My hand gave an involuntary jerk in my lap. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I held it tight with the other hand, but I felt the lava boiling beneath the surface, it needed to get out. I banished the memory from my thoughts, focusing on the here. The now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I imagined the lava cooling, imagined steam rising the way it would when mom poured cool water over the pot when it had boiled too much. Imagined that satisfying sound as hot fought the cold and lost. I felt my hands go steady, felt the lava cool to. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A knock at the door made me jump, “Cole, hon, dinner's ready” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>My heart pounded louder, fear making my throat tighten- I didn't trust myself to reply. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mom tried the doorknob- locked, “Cole?” She said, a little more worried now. I forced myself to swallow, to breathe. Then I rose and walked the short distance from my bed to the door, opening it a crack. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mom took in my face, and I saw myself the way she must've, wild eyes and flushed cheeks. she reached a hand to touch my cheek lightly, but the second she made contact with my skin- mom jerked her hand back, a look of worry taking over her features. Instead of backing away, mom pulled me closer, placing her hand against my forehead then my neck, her face paling and her fear growing more by the second. “Cole- you're burning up- are you okay? Have you eaten anything? Do you feel woozy or-” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I batted her hands away, heart pounding and gave her a look of irritation. “I'm </span>
  <em>
    <span>fine</span>
  </em>
  <span>, mom” but she kept trying to talk to me, figure out what's wrong. How she could fix it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You can't fix this, mom</span>
  </em>
  <span>, i thought, even as i said “i’m studying . Just leave me alone” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mom wouldn't have it, she forced the door open the rest of the way, then immediately turned her attention to opening the window opposite to my bed. “I'll get you some Panadol, just sit tight- and change out of those sweats, they're too hot for the summer- shorts. Shorts are good-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Mom!”</span>
  </em>
  <span> I yell angrily, her hand stopped mid air, just as she reached my closet door. She turned to face me. “I'm not a </span>
  <em>
    <span>baby</span>
  </em>
  <span>! I'm not Claire- I can take care of myself!” Now I didn't even need to fake anger or irritation, it seemed instant, and I felt my right hand jerk in response to my temper. I crossed my arms, hugging them close to my chest in an attempt to hide the tick. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The lava had gone from a warm simmer to a full on explosion. Any second now it would let out- I'd blow it and they'd send me away. To the government, or one of the new testing facilities, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>away. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I let the fire come in the form of words, rather than the flame. It would have to be one, but at least in this moment I got to choose. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They weren't always that way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just go away! I don't </span>
  <em>
    <span>need</span>
  </em>
  <span> you- I don't</span>
  <em>
    <span> want</span>
  </em>
  <span> you here! I have things to do just </span>
  <em>
    <span>go!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Mom flinched at my words, but she turned and left, closing the door behind her before I got the chance to slam it shut. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I heard a truck pull into the driveway and swore under my breath. The last thing I needed right now was Harry in here. Harry lecturing me about respect and how to control my temper. Telling me stories of struggles I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>too young</span>
  </em>
  <span> to understand, life lessons I hadn't learned yet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I locked my door, and heard mom's quiet sobs as she relayed the story to a stunned Harry in hushed tones. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I slid against the door and put my head on my knees. This time the lava released itself as tears. Fresh, hot tears raced down my cheeks, and the fire ate me whole. They would never love me if they knew. Liam wouldn't be able to </span>
  <em>
    <span>look</span>
  </em>
  <span> at me. And mom? Mom would flinch away from me. Jerk back her hand the way she had at my touch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>am</span>
  <em>
    <span> burning up, mom. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I thought as footsteps sounded down the hall, boots getting nearer to my door, </span>
  <em>
    <span>but you can't fix this.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>